Holiday Tips for us

Hi MacValley Blog readers:

With the arrival of Halloween and a return to normal standard time (whatever that is), I should start passing out tips for the holidays.

Write down your Wi-Fi password and put it into your cell phone’s notes application right now. That way, you won’t get caught in your pajamas, or whatever you wear to bed, on some holiday morning frantically looking for the Wi-Fi router password!

Set up a separate table for the holiday food and drink. Do Not put a laptop on the same table as a mimosa, eggnog, or any other liquid. I recently tripped over a cord, spilled a drink and shorted out the display in a laptop. So, learn from my mistake!

Get a supply of those moist towelettes to wipe up spills. Get a can of compressed air to blow off the dust. 

If you have the time, spend some time cleaning up your computer desk. I can tell you it’s probably gross looking. 

Don’t use Windex or any other glass cleaning product to clean an LCD screen. This applies to your big screen TV or a laptop or tablet. No, no, no! Get an LCD cleaning kit. They’re in the checkout lane at Frys, Best Buy and at Costco in the jumbo pack.

What can you get for someone who’s obsessed with any sort of computers?

A good set of headphones, because you probably don’t want to hear the noise from a video game or YouTube video on any given holiday morning. I recently ordered a set of Sony MDR-7506 headphones from Amazon and I love them. 

An extra monitor in case the laptop’s display goes out. You want one or more of the following connections: (1) VGA, which is compatible with computers going back to the early 1990s; (2) HDMI, which means you can plug a video game console into it; (3) Displayport, which works with many current computers. 

No, you don’t need to buy the 34” curved 4K gaming monitor. I’m assuming the display goes blank when they start writing their term papers at 3:00 AM the morning before they are due. A 23” 1920 x1080 display for $120 is fine. 

An extra wired Windows keyboard and mouse. At some point, your computer nerd will need an extra keyboard and mouse at an inconvenient time. They’ll remember you fondly if you gave them a box with a spare set of them. Don’t go super-fancy, Amazon Basic is fine for these emergencies.

If your video gamer tells you they’d really like a $800-dollar video card, tell them that Starbucks is always hiring. Nothing like some impetus to get them out of the house!

A Brother P-Touch labeler. Lots of stuff that looks the same and needs labelling. A God-send! (And don’t forget extra batteries!)

A pack of Post-it/Sticky notes. Get these at Costco or Staples or Office Depot for each member of the family.

A blister pack of Sharpie pens. You need these to label CDs and DVDs that they create in their computers.  If they don’t know what CDs and DVDs are, you can use these with the Sticky notes.

Cans of compressed air. Always handy for cleaning stuff out of those hard to reach corners.

If it’s Christmas morning and you can’t think of anything, just go get an Amazon gift card for them at the nearest store. They can buy digital music, computer mice, and a Star-Wars themed coffee pot. 

Stuff not to buy for the holidays:

No Tape cassettes. If they own a cassette tape recorder, as I do, they already have the cassettes.

No Floppy disks in any size. They are too destructible. Buy a 5-pack of USB flash drives instead.

No Holiday music in any form. Let them get this on their own! It’ll go on sale after the holidays.  Unless you’ve got the original manuscript of White Christmas autographed by Irving Berlin, holiday music has come out of every musical orifice imaginable. 

What are my holiday plans?

I plan to read David Sedaris’s Holidays on Ice while drinking Margaritas and listening to Chopin. As far as I know, Chopin never wrote any holiday music or drank any margaritas

As for margaritas at 8:00 am, well, it’s got to be raining somewhere!

If you don’t want to read David’s recollections of working as an elf at Macy’s, read A Christmas Carol or watch A Charlie Brown Christmas.  Or read the Christmas source code and open a New Testament.

 

As for that statement about “Christmas source code,” no, I don’t include any rants against gay people, women, people of other faiths, and people seeking shelter from oppression added waaay after the Gospels. I mean peace and good will toward ALL. Sit down and have a piece of the holiday goodies. Yes, the muffins are gluten-free! And we have eggnog made with rice milk over there in the crockpot. 

Now off to the sales!

 

Tom Briant

Editor, MacValley Blog